Stress, Anxiety & Depression

Psychotherapist & couples therapist specializing in relational psychological problems

Couple therapy and psychotherapy for stress, anxiety & depression

Couples therapy for psychological problems and relationship problems

At least 20% are affected at one point or another by psychological problems, e.g. stress, anxiety or depression. 26% thus seek help for stress, 18% for anxiety, 40% for depression and 25% for grief (YouGov, 2016). Often it is a combination. Derived from or related to relationships and family,  alcohol and  adultery , or work and career. These are Parterapi-parterapeut.dk’s specialties. See below and in the menu. Depression is cf. WHO one of the biggest causes of debilitating living conditions worldwide and globally over 300 million people are affected by depression. According to the WHO, stress, anxiety and depression will collectively become one of the biggest disease factors, now and in the future. 10-12% of all Danes experience symptoms of severe stress on a daily basis (Stressforeningen, 2021). It affects the individual, the relatives and working life. When there are two as in a relationship or four as in a nuclear family, the likelihood that one of the parties will at some point be affected by mental illness increases. Parterapi-parterapeut.dk is therefore happy to involve the relatives. When you are affected by stress, anxiety or depression, it is not just you. The family, the relationship and  the sex life are also affected. For many, it goes beyond the body and health. Eg. sleep, immune system, lifestyle, nutrition, exercise, medicine, self-medication and alcohol, etc When stress, anxiety and depression need to be treated, the couple and the family are the most healing and health-creating factors (Grant Study, Harvard). Without the involvement of the couple and the family, the system may unconsciously and despite the best intentions, risk worsening or delaying healing. Therefore, relational psychological treatment is important for psychological problems. Parterapi-parterapeut.dk offers effective and relational psychotherapy, couple therapy and family therapy for stressful stress reactions, anxiety and depression. Often in a combination of what works best for you. For example, meditation, mindfulness, music therapy, yoga… and body therapy or Access Bars and Access Body Processes. Access Bars can e.g. reduce stress by 97% (Indenpendant survey, 2019), anxiety and depression by over 80% (Dr. T. Hope, 2017). There are similar figures for pain relief and increased enjoyment of life. Most people will of course have more than one treatment, but read more about research and research results for this simple, easy, fast and effective form of treatment that has helped many people. At Parterapi-parterapeut.dk you can both get  Access Bars treatment and become certified in Access Bars and Access Body Processes yourself. If you become certified together with your partner, you become your own therapist and strengthen the relationship. Below, the starting point is stressful load reactions and depression, but Parterapi-parterapeut.dk helps just as well and with great experience in midlife crisis, crisis, loss and grief . The therapist at Parterapi-parterapeut.dk also has experience from social psychiatry and with many other diagnoses including adult-children of alcoholics borderline, alcohol addiction, autism, ADHD, ADD, PTSD, C-PTST, schizophrenia…stress is technically still not an official diagnosis, but a symptom. But if stress is not taken seriously, it can lead to both mental and physical illness.

Stress, anxiety & depression have many names

Stress, anxiety and depression have in many ways become everyday words that cover many different forms and degrees. Ranging from clinical illness to various symptoms, feelings, moods, conditions and reactions. Mentally as well as physically.

Some stressed, anxious and depressed people experience an absence of self-esteem and find it difficult to feel themselves. They feel empty of emotion, while things that used to be a source of joy suddenly become uninteresting, meaningless and ineffective.

It’s like everything becomes gray and unimportant. Just as food loses its taste, many stressed, anxious and depressed people also lose their appetite, thirst and sex drive. This is also known for midlife crises.

For many it is worst in the morning. Some stressed, anxious and depressed people cannot get up, shower, get dressed, cook, brush their teeth and go to work. They completely lose focus or become overfocused.

For example, restlessness, inhibition, inner turmoil, irritation, anger, criticism, blame, negative self-talk, hopelessness, urge to drink, self-medication, self-harm, obsessions and hallucinations can also be observed in some.

No two people or processes are the same and many times things tend to interfere. We start where you are and with what seems to be most important in your situation.

Below you can read more about stress, anxiety and depression.

Including the relationship, the family and the importance of relationships as well as symptoms, causes, diagnosis, medicine and various forms of treatment in addition to relational psychotherapy, couple therapy and family therapy.

Always consult a doctor regarding questions, doubts, symptoms, suicidal thoughts, diagnosis and medication. Only a doctor can diagnose and prescribe.

Many can nod in recognition to:

  • fault
  • shame
  • self-blame
  • low self-esteem
  • reduced mood rent
  • sadness
  • depression
  • heavy minded
  • discouragement
  • pessimism
  • hopelessness
  • abandonment
  • transparency
  • unhappiness
  • fatigue
  • exhaustion
  • heaviness in the body
  • pains
  • memory difficulties
  • difficulty concentrating
  • decision making difficulties
  • planning difficulties
  • appetite disturbances
  • sleep disorders
  • lack of energy, desire & sex drive
  • read more at the bottom of the page

Why do I get stressed, anxious and depressed?

It can be difficult to determine the specific cause of stress, anxiety and depression. There are many thoughts and theories.

Previously, a distinction was made between external (exogenous) and internal (endogenous) conditions.

Today, it seems that most people agree on a more systemic way of thinking, where e.g. is a neurobiological problem in combination with a degree of vulnerability. It is therefore an advantage to involve the next of kin.

Stress, anxiety and depression are therefore often a combination of direct and indirect conditions and strains. It can be, for example:

  • Bad relationships (partnership, family or work)
  • Bullying and conflicts (the relationship, family or work)
  • Problems in relation to anger, appreciation, violation and low self-esteem
  • Life changes (moving, maternity, children moving away from home or retirement)
  • Loss (disability, death, adultery, divorce or dismissal)
  • Serious physical illness (oneself or a loved one)
  • Lack of care, failure or abuse in childhood
  • Alcohol or other abuse incl. having grown up in an abusive home
  • Certain medical preparations (nerve medicine, blood pressure medicine and hormones)
  • Lifestyle (ambitions, lack of exercise and daylight, unhealthy diet and lack of sleep)
  • Social problems, loneliness, isolation and lack of physical contact
  • Prolonged stress or acute serious situations
  • Genetics, heredity, metabolism and hormonal disorders
  • You also see depression such as winter depression
  • Postpartum depression and other major life transitions

Your relationships are important in stress, anxiety & depression

We are our relationships

Everything is relational and as human beings we come to be in the contact and the relationship.

Our mental state, well-being, self-regulation and development are affected by our relationships and the quality of the relationships we enter into.

The workplace, leisure time, family and relationships are important sources of meaningful, close, nurturing, loving, appreciative, developing, supportive, safe and secure relationships. It is what creates health, growth and development.

Relationships, stress, anxiety and depression

Our relationships are a source of problems, as well as healing and development. When we understand ourselves and the system, we can turn stumbling blocks into stepping stones.

When relationships are good and things are going well, we feel ‘ok’ – seen, heard, acknowledged, accepted and taken seriously. We gain profit, self-love, self-confidence, self-development and self-esteem.

Conversely, it is when we feel isolated and lonely or there is a crunch in the family and the relationship. Or when we feel overlooked, ignored, misunderstood, criticized, attacked, violated, bullied, rejected, condemned, outside the community and without support.

Then we feel ‘not-ok’ – lonely, wrong, frustrated, angry, sad, bored, hopeless, helpless, scared, insecure, stressed, anxious and depressed.

Stress, anxiety, depression and self-regulation

Depression, as well as stress and anxiety, is primarily due to something unconscious about oneself. In combination with not feeling seen and understood by those close to us, as well as suppressing feelings and communication or holding back in some other way. It goes beyond self-regulation.

It is difficult to find room for ego, anger and aggression in modern society, where everyone must be nice, nice, happy, perfect, successful and happy.

The negative emotions such as anxiety, anger, depression and sadness are suppressed instead of being expressed and dealt with. It causes inappropriate self-regulation and problems.

The deficient or inappropriate self-regulation can lead to frustration and stress, implosion and depression or anger and explosion.

A middle ground for psychological pain can be diversion, self-medication and abuse. For example overtime, extreme sports, sugar, food, tobacco, alcohol, the screen, porn, promiscuity and adultery.

Stress, anxiety and depression are linked

Stress, anxiety, depression, sadness and anger go hand in hand. Often one thing leads to another. It can happen in an unnoticed or in a smooth transition. From everyday life to distinctiveness, strangeness and illness.

The solution, method and tools for stress, anxiety and depression

The solution is found in the relationship to oneself and the outside world and consists in self-regulation – awareness, responsibility, action and learning.

The method is relational psychotherapy, family and couple therapy.

Possibly in combination with effective tools, such as meditation, yoga or bodily energy work in the form of Access Bars and Access Body Processes. See below and in the menu.

Relationship-oriented treatment of stress, anxiety & depression

The relationships are the answer and the cure for stress, anxiety and depression

In principle, it is not difficult to treat stress, anxiety and depression. The challenge is to find the difference that makes the difference. And the answer must come from the client himself. Here, relatives are often a help and support.

Psychotherapy via relational forms of therapy such as family therapy, couple therapy and imagotherapy are therefore preferable.

Psychotherapy where you bring your spouse or partner to the talks is far more effective than traditional treatment. The relationship and love is a healing factor. The relatives also get help at the same time as they can support the depressed person.

The past, the present and the future

We all have old wounds, losses, failures and larger or smaller attachment traumas or other trauma holes that we can fall back into.

The relationship and love can clarify, heal and help us get out of the holes and move on in life.

Close relationships such as family and relationships trigger old feelings, wounds and patterns as well as new pain. This can happen if we feel rejected or not heard. In this way, we are exposed and reminded of something.

If we go through the same thing, we stand stronger and more whole on the other side.

These problems are primarily due to the fact that we matter to each other. Otherwise, it was unproblematic. Next, we often find a partner with related or opposite issues, so we trigger each other.

The past can therefore shape the present. It can happen unconsciously and automatically. However, we clearly feel the signs. We feel anxious, ignored, rejected, misunderstood, frustrated, stressed and angry or hurt, giving up, hopeless, discouraged, depressed, sad and depressed.

The relationship is thus important, as this is where the challenges come to light and where they can be dealt with.

Live by design and not by destiny

Get help to understand yourself, your past and what it takes to get what you want. When you have understood yourself, what you want and how you can achieve effective self-regulation, you will always be able to create what you dream of. The best is yet to come!

Stress, anxiety and depression are not just empty energy, but rather compressed energy with subtle questions that have been overlooked, need to be found, decoded, answered and acted upon.

The underlying longings, frustrations and disappointments can relate to the family and the relationship. As well as external factors. But depression typically always affects the relationship.

So no matter what, the relationship must at one point or another be included in the treatment. Regardless of which of the three legs (the person, the relationship and the outside world) may be the starting point for the overall treatment.

As a psychotherapist with a specialty in family and couples therapy and experience with stressful stress reactions, anxiety depression, Parterapi-parterapeut.dk finds precisely that the holistic and relationship-oriented treatment in close connection with the couple, the family and the environment is particularly effective.

Parterapi-parterapeut.dk also finds that the couple therapy space (whether physical or online) is particularly supportive for the stressed, anxious or depressed and the relatives. At the same time as it forms a platform for complex work.

One of the things that makes stress, anxiety and depression difficult for couples is, unlike a broken arm, that depression can be difficult to see, understand and be aware of. Both for the victim and the next of kin.

The stress, anxiety and depression can almost be self-reinforcing for everything that otherwise gave joy and energy, which now loses interest, power and luster. Many therefore stop doing the things that are otherwise good, healthy and healing for them.

This makes the whole thing even more difficult and hopeless for all parties. At the same time, a bad relationship can also cause or intensify stress, anxiety, depression and, for example, abuse.

Likewise, the things that we previously soothed ourselves with and took refuge in in a stressful everyday life or a distressed relationship lose their power. For some, this means increased alcohol consumption (self-medication). Although in most cases it just makes the stressful, depressive and anxious condition worse.

If you already have moderate to heavy alcohol consumption, there is also a risk of developing future depression or anxiety. Other drugs such as amphetamine and ecstasy (MDMA) can also cause depression.

Couple therapy supports handling the situation in the couple and builds relational support and healing through understanding, inclusiveness, recognition, empathy, closeness and love.

More specifically, it provides a better relationship and a more authentic contact. A resource in itself that contributes to a positive spiral.

Parterapi-parterapeu.dk also has over 15 years of experience with alcohol, addiction treatment and relatives work.

Anxious and depressive reactions are seen in close association with stress, burnout and strain reactions. Either because the vulnerability of the person in question is high, or because the psychological strain is severe and long-lasting.

Since the depressed person usually has an elevated level of stress hormones in the blood, the depressed person is chronically stressed. It is, among other things, that which tires the brain, and affects energy levels, mood, appetite, sleep and immune system.

Problems in the relationship and the family incl. arguments, attachment problems, anxiety, loss and grief can also be extremely stressful and develop or worsen the situation and depression.

Stress, anxiety and depression in the relationship and the family can act as a vicious and self-reinforcing spiral. Especially for men in connection with postpartum depression.

Approx. 4-10% of men get postpartum depression, and the biggest reason is problems in the relationship. Next are the great expectations and ambitions as well as the loss, the missing, the shame and the guilt of leaving the family after 14 days of maternity leave.

If the family and the partner are involved in the psychological treatment using family and couple therapy, a positive and self-reinforcing spiral can be created. It helps to alleviate, heal and strengthen the system as well as solve the underlying or surrounding problems.

By means of insight and competence enhancement, it is also prevented that the system will unknowingly work against the situation of the anxious and depressed.

According to dr. with. Bobby Zachariae, it is important that you take long-term stress seriously and get support and help for prevention, as stress can put a strain on your physical and mental health.

If left alone, long-term stress can develop into stress depression and burnout. It can take a long time to get out.

The general symptoms of depression are:

  • Lack of energy
  • Sleep disorders
  • Appetite disturbances
  • Decreased sex drive
  • Anxiety & inner turmoil
  • Obsessions
  • Difficulty concentrating
  • Self-blame 
  • Possibly. suicidal thoughts

The symptoms can be very individual and they can be difficult to see, talk about and understand. For the depressive, as well as the relatives.

Although it may be uncomfortable, try to listen to your body and thoughts. Listen to your self-talk. What do you say and think about yourself, the outside world, life, the past, the present and the future? Try to write it down and take them with you to therapy.

 

Some want to get a diagnosis and some don’t.

There are thus a number of depression sufferers who seek to avoid a formal diagnosis, for fear of being labeled as mentally ill or for fear of the system and the insurance consequences, etc.

Therefore, many depression-related problems are often referred to as stress (Pol 20141001).

Others simply seek a diagnosis in the hope of peace of mind or to be able to receive externally funded treatment, sick leave or a pension.

However, according to the Danish Health Authority’s new guidelines, the public no longer offers treatment for mild depression (Pol 20080228). But you can still apply for private treatment yourself at, for example, Parterapi-parterapeut.dk.

In a clinical sense, depression is diagnosed cf. ICD-10 of the clinical designation and an F number. It can be, for example:

  • F31x Bipolar (manic-depressive)
  • F32x Single episode
  • F33x Recurrent (periodic)
  • F34x Persistent (chronic)
  • F38x Others
  • F39x Unspecified

In the diagnosis, a distinction is made between whether the depression is isolated, recurrent or fluctuating (bipolar) and mild, moderate or severe.

Are you depressed and do you want psychotherapy, couple therapy or family therapy? Then it is recommended that you talk to your doctor about your situation.

Always consult a doctor in case of doubt or symptoms.

If you suspect that you are depressed, it is important in terms of treatment that it is diagnosed as early as possible.

In all cases, a doctor is needed for an official diagnosis to be made.

Some depressed clients experience anxiety attacks as part of the depression. Anxiety is thus often a big burden on top of all the other symptoms.

It can also deceive the doctor, because when diagnosing, you risk focusing on the anxiety and thereby forgetting the underlying depression. Anxiety is also a symptom that can be associated with many other mental illnesses.

Overall, for information purposes, there are five different types of anxiety, as an independent diagnosis:

  • agoraphobia
  • social phobia
  • single phobia
  • panic disorder
  • generalized anxiety

Many clients do not exactly have anxiety attacks, but rather a feeling of inner restlessness and restlessness. Which can also be very painful.

In such situations, you can be in the risk zone for suicide, because you are tormented at the same time as you have enough energy to be able to commit suicide.

Anxiety can also arise as a result of prolonged depression, where one’s skills and self-esteem deteriorate in combination with e.g. isolation.

The anxiety can both affect the self-perception in a negative direction and at the same time it can lead to avoidance behaviour. One tries to avoid stressful and anxiety-provoking situations. It can lead to a negative spiral where you avoid challenge as well as learning and support from the environment.

If you at the same time isolate yourself and limit yourself to your options, you reduce your stress and coping ability. This can lead to further depression and anxiety.

General information about medicine and psychotherapy

Anxiety and depression can, among other things, treated with medication and psychotherapy. Especially relationship-oriented psychotherapy such as family therapy, couples therapy and imagotherapy.

Unfortunately, there are many who receive depression medication, and many receive it over a long period of time. Sometimes several years.

Using medicine is not without risks and side effects. And it can be difficult to step out.

Some medicine soothes the symptoms and regulates the signaling substances in the brain. For some, it can thus be difficult to feel yourself. For many, it takes the edge off the emotional swings. Unfortunately, this also applies to the positive emotional fluctuations such as desire and joy.

In terms of experience, the problems are best understood in the light of their history and in relation to the life that the individual person has had and wants to live. And if you want to feel differently, you must therefore also live differently. Psychotherapy can help you with that.

In 2013, 439,000 Danes received depression medication

The fact that many are given depression medication is mainly connected to the fact that the biologically oriented medical science, which is governed by the natural scientific world view, has difficulty seeing the possibilities of modern psychotherapy.

At the same time, it is believed that doctors are to some extent dependent on the pharmaceutical industry.

This connection has been demonstrated by Professor Peter Gøtzsche in the book ‘Lethal medicine and organized crime’ and in Politikkens Kronik from 6 January 2014.

Unfortunately, the patients are offered medication to a greater extent and psychotherapy to a lesser extent.

The problem is also that you become both dependent and sick from years of medication. At worst, the medicine changes the brain itself and not the disease. This has been demonstrated by science journalist Robert Whitaker in the book ‘The Psychiatric Epidemic’.

The benefit of anti-depressants (anti-depressants/SSRIs) is that they take the worst of the deep emotional swings (the sadness).

The downside is that the medication does not remove the depression or the cause, while it also takes the peaks of the emotional swings (the joy).

In addition, the antidepressant medication often affects sex drive, sex life and sexuality.

It can be difficult for both parties and cause completely different problems in the relationship. At the same time, sex life is nature’s own medicine against depression, in the way that the hormones that are secreted lift our mood and provide energy and quality of life.

The hormone system of sexuality and depression are two completely different, opposite and exclusive hormone systems. One of the challenges of depression is thus that the sex drive is inhibited. It can therefore be difficult enough in advance to find the desire for sex when you are depressed. But even more difficult when you are on medication at the same time.

Conversely, sex and cohabitation are a healing force. Sexological conversation therapy can therefore be included in couple therapy. Just as isolation, rapprochement, rejection, disappointment, bitterness, grudge and anger can be issues that are dealt with in psychotherapeutic work.

Have you had depression before? Then there is a risk that you will get it again.

Cf. PhD and researcher Jacob Piet is there approx. 60% risk of getting a new depression if you have previously suffered from depression. After two depressions the risk is 70% and with three or more the risk can be as high as 90%.

However, these rates are significantly reduced if you get treatment and learn how to manage it.

If there is a risk of stress developing into, or having developed into, anxiety and depression, you can seek clarifying, preventive or curative psychotherapy.

It is unfortunately not uncommon to have suicidal thoughts, suicidal threats and suicide attempts in connection with stress, anxiety and depression. Paradoxically, even when things start to get better.

It is generally quite normal to have depression and suicidal problems in connection with family and relationship problems.

Since suicidal thoughts are often forbidden and taboo, many people unconsciously suppress them.

There are also many who can feel the forbidden feelings and thoughts somewhere, but hold them back, as suicide is often an unpleasant subject. Others soothe it with work, sports, porn, sex, alcohol or drugs.

Around 10-15% of all severely depressed patients commit suicide if they do not receive treatment. They often feel so depressed and worthless that they don’t think there is any other way out than to take their own life. Some even believe that they do not deserve to live.

Some do it in silence and others threaten suicide. One can thus be suicidal and/or suicidal.

Since no one can immediately tell the difference, it is always important to take a suicide threat seriously. And if you yourself are considering suicide, you should always immediately contact a doctor, the emergency room or the psychiatric emergency room. Those at risk of suicide and relatives can also contact the Lifeline.

As a psychotherapist, Parterapi-parterapeut.dk typically does not only work with more severe depressions, as these typically require medical treatment and possibly hospitalization. Psychotherapy must be seen as a supplement.

As a couples therapist, Parterapi-parterapeut.dk primarily works with mild to moderate depression, where the depressive is sometimes previously or concurrently in other individual treatment.

Regardless, Parterapi-parterapeut.dk always takes suicide problems seriously and treats them as part of the depression problem. But it must also be clear to everyone that the treatment is at one’s own risk and responsibility and not to be compared with medical treatment.

Neither the therapist nor Parterapi-parterapeut.dk takes responsibility for the health, life, relationships, decisions and actions of others – neither directly nor indirectly.

In the event that the client has suicidal problems, it is always assumed that a contract (agreement) is entered into that the client will not attempt or commit suicide during the treatment.

If this contract is broken, the client-therapist relationship is immediately terminated and the client must also immediately contact a doctor, emergency room or police for emergency help.

Our psychological well-being depends, in line with our relationships, on the cultural norms.

We live in a culture that is largely characterized by values ​​and norms around individuality, freedom and responsibility, as well as, unfortunately, perfectionism, success and happiness. For most, it sets the bar (norm) high and makes it difficult to live up to.

At the same time, it reduces margins and stress. Since the norms tell us what is normal, it is now harder to be normal, good enough, right and happy.

Our own, partner’s, family’s, workplace’s and culture’s high goals lead to constant striving, comparison, assessment and praise or criticism.

At the same time, there is less room for man and his being, as well as feeling ourselves and being ourselves. Authentic. It typically leads to emptiness, pressure, stress, anxiety and sadness. Or actually anxiety, depression and burnout.

When you succeed in living up to the high standards, it gives at best a short-term and narcissistic kick, before the hunt for the next fix.

At worst, it is inhumane to many. They cannot constantly live up to the glossy image. The goal and image they have set themselves, or the goal and image the elitist cultural norms, society, the workplace, friends and facebook set up.

It causes low self-esteem, anxiety, sadness, disappointments, sadness, anger and depression. At the same time, we quickly become ashamed of not being happy, strong, cool, smart, smart and successful enough.

Or we feel guilty for not utilizing our resources, skills and opportunities to the fullest. So on the one hand we do everything right or more and on the other hand we feel even more empty, wrong and sad.

Some become anxious, depressed. Because when they do everything right and still aren’t happy, then it must be them that’s wrong, after which they go to the doctor and maybe get a diagnosis and medication. Or self-medicates with e.g. alcohol.

There is a certain connection between upbringing, personality disorders and depression.

According to developmental psychological theories, the risk of developing a personality disorder is greatest if you did not receive the right care as a child. It is at that time that as a child you have to learn to cope without the deep dependence on the parents.

If development goes awry in this phase, one does not sufficiently learn to be separate from others and to fend for oneself. Therefore, you continue to form relationships with other people, such as are symbiotic, withdrawn or disturbed.

It is one of several reasons why one can develop an emotionally unstable personality disorder (impulsive type or borderline type). If someone in your family has an emotionally unstable personality disorder or suffers from depression, you have e.g. greater risk of having a personality disorder themselves.

Another explanation could be that you have had an unstable childhood, where your parents may have been drinking, or that you have been left to your own devices for other reasons.

You may also have been exposed to physical or sexual abuse. With a personality disorder, you also have a greater risk of developing depression yourself over time.

It is both a help for the anxious and depressed person as well as the relative if the relative participates in the therapy. Regardless of whether it is relatives’ interviews, couple’s therapy or family therapy.

If you are a relative (partner, family member, friend, colleague, boss) of someone with anxiety or depression, it is also an advantage that you familiarize yourself with anxiety and depression.

Anxiety and depression treatment in general and more specifically how you can best be there for the depressive. How you can best support the treatment. How you can best be there for yourself and what support options you have yourself.

Disease incl. depression, as well as stress and anxious conditions, have the effect of affecting both parties, the relationship and the family. Bringing balance to the dynamic works for all of you as well as for healing.

However, the gender gap in Denmark is generally less stereotyped than abroad. However, this does not necessarily make the problem any less – not even in homosexual relationships.

On the contrary, it is often both difficult for both the man, the woman and the couple. The man often feels powerless and inadequate and the woman feels not seen and let down.

Without treatment, many thus end up getting divorced, which along the way affects both the family and the children. Who then have both a divorce and an important carer’s illness in their rucksack.

However, giving yourself guilt, shame or a guilty conscience is not necessarily a problem in itself or any help.

Mindfulness is an effective treatment method for depression, which is often included in the treatment in one or more ways. Either directly or indirectly – whether the therapy takes place individually or with a relative.

Mindfulness as an independent treatment method is typically too intensive, challenging and time-consuming. Such a course of treatment typically lasts for eight weeks, where once a week you come to classes/courses and each day you have to train for an hour.

Thus, I have many individual clients and couples who have been “prescribed” mindfulness and who have difficulty concentrating on it, finding energy for it, focusing during the exercises or completing them. If it does, it often has the opposite effect – stress, anxiety, guilt, shame, defeat, feelings of inadequacy and abandonment.

Then there are other methods such as e.g. Access Bars and Access Body Processes. Here you can lie down and receive a treatment fully clothed, relaxed without having to do anything but simply enjoy and receive. How does it get any better than that? It even has the same immediate effect as years of deep meditation. Read more about Access Bars in the menu and on this page.

I myself have been practicing meditation and mindfulness since 2003. So if you already have a mindfulness program, I would be happy to help you adapt and integrate the methods into daily life and in relation to your partner, etc.

In this way, it becomes practical and realistic at the same time that it also brings joy to the partner, strengthens the relationship and creates a positive dynamic.

Accelerate the healing process with mindfulness


The mindfulness method helps to develop awareness, compassion, connectedness and love for ourselves. When the mindfulness method is also integrated into the relationship, the healing process is accelerated in relation to those closest to you and the outside world. Then we typically also become more appreciative, spacious and connected.

Mindfulness is in itself a relationship-oriented treatment method, which is strengthened through couple therapy, family therapy and relatives’ work.

If you do not already have a mindfulness program, the therapy is supplemented with simple mindfulness exercises, which can gradually become a loving and supportive practice in everyday life and in the relationship. Several of the methods I already use are in themselves based on or linked to mindfulness.

In addition, psychotherapy can be supported with:

  • Body awareness, mental training and visualization
  • Relaxation exercises, breathing exercises and awareness training
  • Insight, mentalization and affect regulation
  • Positive reformulation, positive self-talk and positive affirmations
  • Empathy, sympathy and connectedness
  • Communication, dialogue and problem solving
  • Transaction analysis, assertion training and boundary setting
  • Sleep guidance and sleep therapy

Relaxation exercises (Jarvis et al. 1995) can include mentioned:

  • Progressive muscle relaxation procedures (muscle group by muscle group)
  • Mental relaxation procedures (breathing, focusing and visualization)
  • Isometric relaxation procedure (counter-tension and relaxation)

Some depressives find it difficult to adjust to meditation or mindfulness and activities such as relaxation exercises. Others really just want to sleep.

But it is far from everyone with stressful, anxious and depressive conditions who can sleep. Some may think that they sometimes sleep too much. Many of them take great pleasure in simply resting a little once a day. But since it can be difficult for many to find peace about it, they give up.

This is where music therapy can be beneficial.

You lie down in a quiet and pleasantly temperate place. Then you listen to some mentally soothing and relaxing music while letting your thoughts drift without judging or judging them.

Some become so relaxed along the way that they fall asleep. But here it is important not to sleep too long.

Research shows that it is most effective precisely to sleep for just 20 min. Neither more nor less. If the goal is to sleep, then set an alarm clock to ring after 20 minutes.

Music therapy can also be used if you have difficulty falling asleep in general. bedtime or waking up at night or too early in the morning. If nothing else, if you were unable to fall asleep, music therapy can help you have a positive experience as well as rest and de-stress.

Many times we managed to sleep properly, but without us actually feeling it, because at times we can sleep so easily that it almost feels as if we are awake.

There is a wide variety of music that is suitable for music therapy, incl. ordinary classical music. There is also a lot of free music available on the internet at places like YouTube and SoundCloud.

Some of the music you find there is spiritual – if you want it to be. If you don’t have experience with what works for you, I like to recommend some commercial and recognized music that is both research and evidence based.

For example MusiCure by Niels Eje. If you are visual and positively stimulated through nature images combined with music, you can watch a number of free videos on MusiCure’s website.

You are also welcome to try Access Bars or an Access Body Process. It is completely simple and effortless as well as very pleasant and effective for stress, anxiety and depression. Read more about Access Bars in the menu and on this page.

The sleep rhythm has a significant influence on your well-being, immune system and health.

Serotonin levels are typically lower in the morning, when the depressed also experience the depression at its worst. Many therefore shift their sleep rhythm so that they can sleep in the morning instead. At the same time, serotonin levels rise when you don’t sleep. That is, most people feel better during the day and find benefit in staying awake late and at night.

However, it ends up being a negative spiral, which most people are happy to reverse.

Sleep guidance and sleep therapy can thus be advantageously part of the conversation therapy against depression.

During the treatment, you are also welcome to try Access Bars or an Access Body Process. It is not only particularly effective for stress, anxiety and depression. They have also helped many to sleep better at night and find peace during the day. Read more about Access Bars in the menu and on this page.

Yoga is effective for stress, anxiety and depression.

The therapist at Parterapi-parterapeut.dk is examined RYT200 Yoga Teacher from India and trained by Indians and teaches both physically and online. Individuals, couples, families, teams and companies in yoga, meditation, nidra, pranayama, diet and nutrition. For example, yoga, couple yoga, tantra yoga, yoga therapy and team yoga are offered.

Yoga is good for both body, psyche, mind and relationships. Among other things, yoga is good for joints, back, nervous system, glands, lymph, hormones, blood circulation, metabolism, respiration and even sex life.

Many of these things are important in stress, anxiety and depression.

In relation to stress, anxiety and depression, the most important thing is that yoga helps you balance and train the autonomic nervous system. It consists of two parts that should easily and elegantly help you with your self-regulation. Quickly and effortlessly get up and then down into gear.

The sympathetic nervous system is what helps you get into gear and the parasympathetic nervous system is what helps you get down. With yoga and yoga therapy, you get out of stuckness and inertia and re-establish self-regulation and balance in relation to stress, anxiety and depression.

Yoga and yoga philosophy go back several thousand years with countless benefits as well as preventive and curative effects. At first glance, it may be difficult to see and understand the connection, but it works. Often in a short time.

There is a lot of research into yoga and its effects. The research results merely show what we already know. The easiest thing is to try yoga yourself over a shorter period and then observe the effects on your own body.

Parterapi-parterapeut.dk offers yoga separately and as part of the therapy.

  • Get more ease, joy and glory
  • Get down into the body and achieve more joy
  • Open up, let go and create possibilities
  • Achieve emotional and physical change (transition)
  • Free yourself from pain, stress, anxiety and depression
  • Take your partner along and strengthen the relationship

Access Bars can reduce stress, anxiety and depression by over 80%.

The therapist at Parterapi-parterapeut.dk is certified within Access Consciousness as Access Bars and Access Body Process Facilitator.

Access offers a wide range of tools, processes and treatments that are effective in creating rapid change. Especially within stress, anxiety and depression.

The advantage is that it is light, simple and effective. All you have to do is enjoy and receive. At worst it’s just extremely comfortable and at best it can instantly change your life. Maybe with simple treatment.

You can receive an access treatment, methods and facilitation, separately or as part of the psychotherapy. You therefore only have to book a regular consultation, where you then get both psychotherapy and access.

Access can also be an element of couple therapy. You can thus have several treatments in one, alone or with your partner, for one and the same price. How does it get any better than that?

If you and your partner like Access Bars, you can also become certified in Access Bars and Access Body Processes at Parterapi-parterapeut.dk. Then you have tools for life that you can use at home and for free. Become your own therapist. What else is possible?

Dr. Jeffrey L. Fannin, PhD, 2015
Brain coherence 85%,
Emotional (42) and/or physical transition (40) 63%

Dr. Terrie Hope PhD, DNM, CFMW, 2019
Severity of anxiety symptoms were decreased by 84.7% (Beck Anxiety Inventory Questionnaire)
Severity of depression symptoms were decreased by 82.7% (Beck Depression Inventory Questionnaire)

Independent Bars Survey Results March-September 2019
Decrease in pain 78.43%
Decrease in stress 97.6%
Decrease in anxiety 86.6%
Increase in happiness 61.9%