- Relationship, house, home, children and work
- Tasks, duties and roles in the relationship
- Who does what and when in the relationship?
- Are you satisfied with the division of roles and tasks in the relationship?
- Do you argue about tasks, duties and roles in the relationship?
- Is there an imbalance in the practical and the intimate in the relationship?
- Is there not enough time for dialogue, dating and intimacy?
- Do your imbalances, arguments and arguments extend beyond the marriage?
Couples therapy, tools and dialogue
Most people who seek couple therapy at Parterapi-parterapeut.dk in Copenhagen have challenges with their communication and psychological contracts. It is connected within couple therapy. Because if you find it difficult to talk together, it will also be difficult to reconcile expectations, negotiate and solve problems. Parterapi-parterapeut.dk therefore offers both psychological process support, communication, problem solving and practical tools. In this blog post, you will get a tool for the practical tasks in the relationship.
The four apocalyptic horsemen in the relationship
Unresolved conflicts and problems are often part of what creates imbalance, frustration, bitterness and resentment in the relationship and marriage. If the conflicts and problems are not resolved, the expectations and the psychological contracts are not aligned either. This leads to what John Gottman calls the four apocalyptic horsemen in the relationship. Challenges that often require couple therapy, as it creates criticism (regrets and discord – often in a pattern where one becomes the top dog and the other the underdog), contempt (belittlement, belittling and disrespect), defense (explanations, justifications, evasions and counterattacks) and the wall (withdrawal, rejection and silence). Once it gets there, it can end up separate-living, trench warfare, alcohol problems, infidelity and divorce. Here, no one listens anymore, while it is difficult with the factors of goodwill and curiosity, which can otherwise reverse the negative spiral.
Repair attempts
Couples therapy is about getting better at quickly fixing things when things go wrong, so that no more days go by in silence and pain. The couples who quickly learn to repair themselves or via couple therapy are also the ones who survive the Danish divorce rate of just over 50%. Conversely, there is over a 90% probability of divorce if the four horsemen of the apocalypse are combined with quick and harsh starts to the arguments as well as poor and inadequate repair attempts. Then you should consider couples therapy as soon as possible. At Parterapi-parterapeut.dk in Copenhagen, you can book an alm. consultation in couples therapy or a couples check-up, where you get a free couple relationship test included. You can then follow up with a short intensive course on clip cards, where you also get a free eBook with four toolboxes, which you can use during couple therapy and at home to counteract the above.
Domestic conflicts, sex life and couples therapy
Many times the division of practical and domestic duties is unfortunately just something that happens – more or less unconsciously. Often based on old habits, the culture, traditional gender roles, misunderstood considerations and general drift over time. In this way, many couples end up taking on tasks, responsibilities and roles in the relationship that they do not really want or are satisfied with. Over time, it goes beyond relationships, love, intimacy or sex life and may require you to seek couples therapy. There are thus many couples with similar problems who either seek couple therapy or sexological talk therapy – because they argue and argue, have developed alcohol problems, have lost their spark, their sex life has come to a standstill or because infidelity has occurred.
Take the bull by the horns or seek couples therapy
Below you will find a free tool for uncovering, distributing and planning your tasks, duties and roles in the home and the relationship. You can use the tool both at home and in your couples therapy – if you have just started a relationship or if you want a redistribution of roles in your marriage. You can download the tool incl. relationship test, personality test and test of the five languages of love on the website via the link:
www.parterapi-parterapeut.dk/parrhordstest-testditparrhord-parterapi-parterapeut.html
Here you will also find a free relationship test and if you scroll down you will find e.g. the tool for task distribution and planning. First try to have the dialogue yourself before you seek couples therapy. If this causes problems, do not hesitate to book a consultation in general. couples therapy or a couples check-up.
Consultation in psychotherapy and couples therapy
You can read more about couple therapy at www.parterapi-partterapeut.dk.
Or book a consultation in couple therapy, image therapy or psychotherapy on tel. 61661900.
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