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If we just could turn back time!
From: www.parterapi-parterapeut.dk
The summer is a busy period for Parterapi-parterapeut.dk, as many seek couple therapy during the summer holidays and just before or after. The summer and the holidays should be relaxation from the everyday race and a good time for the couple with room for contact, relationship and love, but often end with stress, conflicts or the hour of truth.
The hour of truth for the relationship
The hour of truth – a moment when thoughts and feelings emerge and rattle around, get in the way and can no longer be contained or endured. The inner reality that can no longer be ignored during the calm of the holiday, closeness and opportunity to say the painful truth such as:
I have been unhappy in our relationship for a long time. I can’t feel my feelings anymore…for you. I don’t love you anymore. I would like to have some time for myself. I’ve been thinking about moving out. You drink too much. You work too much. You’re never home. You are never present. Our sex life bores me. I have had a side jump. I’m cheating on you. I have fallen in love with a colleague. I have found another. I have one next to it. I have had enough. I want a divorce.
And once the bomb has exploded, the situation often calls for emergency couple therapy. Parterapi-parterapeut.dk is thus ready – as soon as you get home and are available via online consultation per telephone or skype.
Three processes in couple therapy
When this happens, it is often the case that it was only one party who was aware of the problem and who often went for a long time and took misunderstanding into account or tried to feel it out, to find the right words and the right time to to say that. Or the person in question has taken all the blame himself and has only tried to fix himself and the relationship.
Often it ends either with the cup overflowing or with the mistaken belief that the relaxed holiday time is a good moment to tell the truth. For the other party, who have been walking around in the best of faith, such an announcement comes as a shock – ripping the rug out from under them and causing their world to crumble. This party is at the same time completely incomprehensible, outsider and helpless, and now in a personal and existential process without tail or direction. Parterapi-parterapeut.dk often helps both the couple with their joint process as well as each partner with their individual process. It is therefore rarely necessary to do anything other than couple therapy, but in such cases Parterapi-parterapeut.dk will be happy to refer you to an individual psychologist.
The holiday as a project for the couple
Most people look forward to relaxing, but for many couples the holiday becomes a project where expectations are not properly aligned and ends up being stressful or conflict-ridden. Or a project with happiness optimization and catching up on what was neglected, where everything must be perfect and everyone must be satisfied at all times. For some, time passes with talk, imagination and negotiation, rather than action, experience and development.
When ambitions get too high, some end up withdrawing or suppressing themselves and others push through, dominate or explode. This often comes in strong contrast to the everyday life of many couples and families, which often run like a well-oiled machine in fixed procedures and frameworks. But many rarely talk to each other properly and have never really learned how to negotiate, solve problems and repair relationships when things go wrong. And during the holidays, you suddenly find yourself in a completely new setting and situation, where there is also time to ask yourself and each other what you really want. Some therefore seek family therapy and couples therapy at Parterapi-parterapeut.dk before the holidays. Other times, the holiday becomes like a magnifying glass, where habits, alcohol, sadness and depression become more apparent or break out.
Holiday for twoness and to rediscover the spark
The summer holidays can also be the moment when you should be the two of us and rediscover the love and the spark. But at that moment, some people find that they have been suppressing their passion, emotions and frustration for far too long – then the emptiness and the opposite emotions make noise.
The couple may discover that for far too long it has taken up children, house, work and projects. That none of them have been seen, heard and taken seriously. Or that they may have secretly gone and pulled the load at home or been the one who earned the money out in the field – and that none of them have received recognition and love. Often it has gone beyond communication, problem solving, negotiation skills, repair skills, closeness, intimacy and sex life. Parterapi-parterapeut.dk therefore helps both to rebuild the skills and the contact with the parties themselves and with the partner.
The holidays were nice, but now it’s everyday life again
Parterapi-parterapeut.dk also has many couples who have major challenges in everyday life, but as soon as they have a holiday, everything is happy and quiet. And as soon as they get home, stress and arguments continue. Many of these couples help Parterapi-parterapeut.dk to align their values, norms and expectations, to organize their everyday life and roles, to become better at handling stress and to become better at communicating, negotiating and solving problems and conflicts.
Relationships, process and couple therapy as the focus of the holiday
Some of the couples who know full well that the relationship is faltering choose to take the bull by the horns first. Instead of booking a holiday abroad, they book time for their relationship process and couple therapy at Parterapi-parterapeut.dk. Many families and couples also know that it can be hard to land after a holiday – and just as the suitcase needs to be aired after the journey, it may also be that some of the relationships need to be cleaned up, incl. the couple relationship. Some therefore use some of their remaining holiday to pick up and get the word out. If you want to pamper yourself, you can also order intensive couples therapy with a hotel stay.
Rediscover love, repair the relationship and develop the relationship
Lost love, find the spark again! Process arguments, crisis, anger, isolation, infidelity, divorce, reunion… make time for couples therapy. Call immediately and book a consultation in couples therapy. If it is urgent, you will get an appointment within a week. If it is urgent, you will come immediately. You are welcome to, for example, simply book a single consultation and come for a couple check-up, where you will also be sent a free relationship test. On the links at the bottom you can read more about family therapy, couple therapy, couple counselling, image therapy, sexological conversation therapy, alcohol problems in the relationship, stress, anxiety, depression and divorce.
Consultation in couples therapy
You can read more about couple therapy at www.parterapi-partterapeut.dk.
Or book a consultation appointment for a couple check-up, couple therapy or couple counselling, on tel. 6166 1900.
You can also follow along at: www.facebook.com/parterapi.parterapeut