- Are you an adult child of alcoholics in a relationship?
- Or are you in a relationship with an adult child of alcoholics?
- Do the family, the relationship and the close relationships present challenges?
- Do you have relationship problems, arguments and big fluctuations?
- Do you have problems with closeness, attachment, responsibility and commitment?
- Are you fighting for respect, boundaries, safety, wholeness, stability and serenity?
- Did you grow up too soon, do you struggle for closeness and do you love too much?
- Is it the unconscious feelings and patterns of childhood that control your adult life?
- Do you have challenges with authority, loyalty, rejection and lust for pleasure?
- Do you or your partner drink too much alcohol yourself?
- Are you or your partner addicted or co-dependent?
- Do you go from relationship to relationship or stay too long?
Questions about the adult child of alcoholics in a relationship
What does it mean to be an adult child of alcoholics? When and how do you know that you or your partner is an adult child of alcoholics? How does it affect one’s psychology, social skills and dynamics, to have grown up in a more or less dysfunctional home with greater or lesser forms of abuse, hashish and alcohol problems – or other forms of addiction and co-dependency? And what does it mean for your style of relationships, communication, negotiation, problem solving and conflict resolution when you are an adult child of alcoholics?
What does being an adult child of alcoholics mean for one’s internal images (imagos) of the family and the relationship, as well as one’s playbooks and internal mental working models? How does it affect one’s mentalisation, relationship skills and ability to attach, when you are an adult child of alcoholics? What kind of dynamics do you yourself create, repeat and carry on in your relationship and family as well as other close relationships such as friends and at study or the workplace, when you are an adult child of alcoholics? What kind of social roles do you typically take as an adult child of alcoholics?
How should one understand the background and dynamics of being an adult child of alcoholics? What was the situation and problem around the home, family and primary carers? What is the solution and treatment for adult children of alcoholics? How can you turn stumbling blocks into stepping stones and challenges into learning and growth? How can you reconcile and free yourself from the past and create the life, relationships and relationships you really want? How can you, as an adult child of alcoholics, free yourself from the pain, sorrow, shame and anger and become better at handling the contemporary conflicts, when you are unconsciously overwhelmed by the feelings and reactions of childhood and most of all want to fight, flee or solidify?
Answers about the adult child of alcoholics in a relationship
All that and more about adult children of alcoholics incl. the situation, the problem, the solution and the treatment, you can read more about in the following article:
It also explains in more detail why process-oriented and relational psychological treatment such as couple therapy, family therapy and imagotherapy are particularly effective in relation to adult children of alcoholics. Here you can also read more about your own, your partner’s and the relationship’s healing power. If you are not in a relationship, you are welcome alone for individual psychotherapy.
The article is written based on my background as an examined psychotherapist, certified family and imago couple therapist and alcohol therapist. Since 2005, I have experience with counseling and psychotherapy for adult children of alcoholics as well as treatment of alcohol abuse and alcohol dependence incl. couple therapy, family therapy and relatives interviews. I have, among other things, experience from social psychiatry, Tuba, Blue Cross, Link, own practice and the business world. Here I also have experience in treating the companions of alcohol – low self-esteem, stress, anxiety, depression and grief.
Dependence or co-dependence in adult children of alcoholics
Many adult children of alcoholics have a strained relationship with alcohol or have an alcohol addiction themselves. Others marry an addict, an alcoholic, or some other type of compulsive personality. Many alcoholics are also adult children of alcoholics themselves – heritage and environment play a big role through our early imprinting of our images (imagos) of the relationship, family and love. Especially when it comes to alcohol problems.
Regardless, the statistics say that just over 600,000 Danes have harmful alcohol consumption and that for every alcohol abuser there are four who are affected by it. It primarily includes the primary relationships such as the partner, the children, the family, friends and the workplace. If you are in doubt as to whether you or your partner drink too much, you can read more at the link below, where a free alcohol test is also offered:
Reservations about adult children of alcoholics
In this connection, I must state that adult-child-of-alcoholics is neither an accusation, diagnosis nor prognosis. Next, I must state that the adult-child-of-alcoholics problem is a dynamic that can also arise in homes with psychological problems, illness, disability, suicide problems, hospitalizations, prison stays, placements outside the home and adoption as well as other forms of addiction such as gambling addiction, sex addiction, workaholism, abuse, violence, eating disorders…
Different names for adult children of alcoholics
Many people also know the adult-child problem as children of alcoholics, children of alcoholics, antenna children, glass children, soul birds, relatives, adult children of alcoholics, adult children anonymous, aca, tuba, hope… and co-dependency or co-dependency, co-dependency , lust for pleasure, consideration, niceness, attachment problems, attachment trauma, fighting for closeness, love and security, loving too much, taking too much responsibility, being control-obsessed and perfectionistic or simply having grown up too soon and having an inner child or inner child problems. Others know the concept of the adult child of alcoholics in connection with headings such as the invisible labyrinth, the invisible elephant, families with alcoholic monsters, being lost, lost, found again… healing one’s inner child.
The concept of psychotherapy and couples therapy for adult children of alcoholics
- Consultation in couple therapy or a couple check: You can start with a simple consultation in couple therapy or buy a couple check. A couple check includes a specially developed relationship test, couple therapy consultation, analysis and feedback, as well as a free eBook with four couple therapy toolboxes to solve and prevent relationship problems.
- Short and intensive course in couple therapy: You can then continue on your own with the eBook or buy a short intensive course in couple therapy on a clip card. This is enough for most people to get from problem/crisis to stabilization.
- Healing, preventive and developing imago therapy and imago couple therapy:
If you want more, you can continue with developing and preventive couple therapy in an open consultation or in the form of imago therapy, imago couple therapy or family therapy.
Consultation in psychotherapy and couples therapy
You can read more about couple therapy at www.parterapi-partterapeut.dk.
Or book a consultation appointment for a couple check-up, couple therapy or couple counseling on tel. 6166 1900.
Tips for the relationship and love
You can also follow along at: www.facebook.com/parterapi.parterapeut
Or at: www.twitter.com/Parterapeuten